Pirates Behaving Badly – Ask Nicely. Then Rob Them.
Transcript
Welcome aboard.
Thank you, Captain.
Before joining my crew, every pirate must complete our compulsory workplace behavior testing.
Compulsory workplace behavior testing?
Of course. Piracy is a professional industry now.
Right. Proceed.
Question one. A fellow pirate captain has cargo that you desperately need. What do you do?
Steal it.
No. Remember, you're a pirate.
So, steal it.
No.
Plunder it?
No.
Board their ship and go, "Avast, mateys!" and then ransack everything and
No, no. Remember, you're a pirate and they're a pirate. Same side. So,
ask nicely?
Correct.
Okay.
And if they give you something less useful instead?
I accept their decision with grace.
No.
Ask even more nicely.
No. Remember, you're a pirate.
Are they still a pirate in this situation?
Yes, but an unhelpful one in breach of their on workplace behavior training.
So, I can steal and plunder from them now?
Good.
I can board their ship and go, "Avast, mateys!" and ransack everything?
Better.
I can steal everything they've got and then cut their captain adrift into the briny deep.
Recruit of the month, you're hired, mate.
Yes.
Pirates behaving badly plays two to five players with mechanics such as set collection, hand management, and take that, and is of light complexity. In Pirates behaving badly, your rival captains trying to assemble a valuable cargo sets before everybody else. Your goal is simple. Be the first captain to score four sets. But, pirates be pirates. Respectful trading like normal people is far and few in between. You can demand cards from your opponents, send your crew to steal their cargo, shoot at their captain, throw your entire hand away with explosives. Some may call that efficient logistics. And occasionally losing your captain at sea is just an occupational hazard.
There are three kinds of cards. Cargo cards which have goods, crew card, and captain cards. Cards come in five colors representing different goods that are worth fighting for in this era and numbered from one to six. Crew card come in three flavor of maritime employment malpractice. Sharp shooters, swashbucklers, and grenadiers. Everyone starts with eight cargo and one captain card secretly held in hand. On your turn, you choose exactly one of four actions. Then it goes to the next player. Actions are: one, draw a card, which is exactly what it sounds like, draw one into your hand, which is peaceful and off-brand. So, obviously, we won't spend long here.
Two, score a set. Lay down exactly three cards, then draw a card. The set can be three of the same number or crew in any color combination, or three consecutive cargo numbers in the same color, but never your captain card. Play my set down. Three cards of number four.
Well, I want to play this set. Five, six, and one.
You cannot. No representation of consecutive numbers.
What? Pirates don't believe the Earth is round.
The Earth can be round. Your card run cannot. Three, request a card. Select an opponent, say a number and a color. Say three red, and if they have at least a red card, a three card, or a red three card, they must give one card of their choosing to you. You can ask for exactly what you want, but unless it's their only matching card, you're giving your opponent some control over what you actually receive. Now, your captain is hidden in your hand and needs special protection. If another player asks for something matching your captain's color or number, you do not hand over the captain as long as you have another legal card you can surrender instead.
But, if your captain is your only matching card, you are lost at sea. Discard your entire hand, including your captain, then draw a new captain and start to rebuild your hand from the scratch. This makes collecting cards with the same color or number as your captain useful.
They give you something expendable to throw at your opponents. Four, play a crew card to sabotage your opponents. Grenadier lets you discard and redraw your entire hand of cargo cards. A swashbuckler asks an opponent either one color or one number.
They have to give you all matching cargo cards. The sharpshooter asks an opponent for an exact color and number combination.
Target spotted, red four.
Are you sure?
Absolutely.
Wind direction?
Calculated.
Distance?
Calculated.
Target movement?
Calculated.
Wait, you've got the binoculars backward.
Blue two.
Attention, sharpshooter. The first player to put down their fourth set wins immediately. Pirates behaving badly takes a very straightforward, family-friendly set collection game and builds interaction around partial information and awkward choices. You aren't just saying, "What cards do I need?" You're asking what do other players have? What do they know that I have? The request action also means asking for things without necessarily receiving the exact card you named. Deduce probability on what opponents have. If I request a red tree and the opponent gives me a green tree, that tells me something about what they have.
What other cards I probably already have and possibly what they really don't want me to see. It is still a light game with take that. So, maybe don't invite your friends who will respond by defriending you on Facebook. But, for families and groups who enjoy quick interaction and yelling at each other, I know you have a purple four. Then, there's plenty of room for table drama in this quick game.
Captain Stella, in accordance with the pirate code, I request a red one.
Nope.
But, you have to give me something which matches my request.
Fine.
What is this?
Pirate code of conduct.
I don't want this.
You requested something red.
This isn't red.
So, if assembling sets, stealing cargo, and maintaining only the absolute minimum standards of maritime behavior sounds like your kind of voyage, check out Pirates Behaving Badly.
A pirate treasure.